The more I think I know the direction the NFL is going, the more it finds ways to surprise me. For as much as I consider myself a davant(or at least as one can be without knowing how to read coverages), I still find myself in shock. This can mean only one thing: the NFL is in a transition period. I’d be able to enjoy the parity more easily of it was t my burden to tell people who to put their faith in.
Locks
Carolina Panthers vs. LA Rams: Rams
This actually kinda feels like a trap game to me, Baker Mayfield potentially being out and the Rams being about as impressive as their 2-3 record indicates. I can see PJ Walker stepping in and delivering one of the biggest upsets of the weekend. I’m not saying it’s going to happen, as even with Stafford having a down year, he’s better than anything the Panthers have rostered. Not to mention, Carolina has question marks at head coach, as well, and will likely be having a fire sale at the trade deadline.
Safe Bets
San Francisco 49ers vs. Atlanta Falcons: 49ers
This might actually be an interesting one. I feel like a broken record saying this, but my choice this week boils down to “49ers have a serviceable QB that won’t get in the way of a fantastic team.” While boring, this is one leftover narrative from previous years that is yet to die. To that extent, I almost appreciate them, a monolith to an older generation of football where things were constant.
Minnesota Vikings vs. Miami Dolphins
Considering the Dolphins have a laundry list of injuries, including to their starting quarterback who will be sidelined with an oft-discussed head injury, Jaylen Waddle and Tyreek Hill being banged up doesn’t help either. Minnesota should have little trouble expanding their lead in the division.
Cincinnati Bengals vs. New Orleans Saints: Bengals
Speaking of teams that should be easily be dispatched of (and no I’m not just saying this because the Eagles own the Saints’ first round pick). In the immortal words of Mr. T, “I pity the fool that starts Andy Dalton in 2022.” I might have paraphrased a little bit, but the point remains the same.
Avoids
Buffalo Bills vs. Kansas City Chiefs: Buffalo Bills
Oh, what a game (my expression after this matchup is finished because I expect nothing short of the fireworks show we got last year). The only difference is I expect the Bills to emerge victorious this time. Mahomes proved he’s still Bahamut with or without Tyreek Hill, but he sure does help, as Josh Allen would tell you about Stefon Diggs.
Other Picks
New England Patriots vs. Cleveland Browns: Browns
Speaking of teams that have question marks at QB, there’s a very real possibility that Bailey Zappe starts again for the Patriots. Both teams are currently kinda eh, so I had to look at the points scored on the season. Cleveland hasn’t scored under 20 since the season began. Belichick is doubtless going to try to take the run away, but easier said than done since they have Nick Chubb and Kareem Hunt. Also, I have Chubb in fantasy, so I’m hoping Belichick doesn’t have a way to shut him down.
New York Jets vs. Green Bay Packers: Packers
Jets have been impressive this year (considering I though they’d be 0-17). Ignoring that I didn’t anticipate Garrett Wilson holding up as well as he has (both in terms of health and production), my main concern was the quarterback. Since Zach Wilson’s return, the Jets are averaging 32 points per game. Despite this, as was previously established, I’m a coward afraid to take any risks, and am thus pensive about taking a bet on a possibly unsustainable offense. New York has more weapons, but I think this game will be determined by the difference in quarterbacks. If this isn’t the case, then we might need to have a conversation about the Jets.
Jacksonville Jaguars vs. Indianapolis Colts: Jaguars
I can’t remember the last time Jacksonville swept the Colts in a season, but Matt Ryan has been so unexpectedly washed this season (I might still be traumatized by that awful Thursday night game last week), I think Jacksonville can win if they score more than 15 points. 15 points is basically nothing in today’s NFL. I don’t like putting it all on one player, so it’s worth noting Shaq Leonard will be out and Jonathan Taylor will be a shadow of himself assuming he plays.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers vs. Pittsburgh Steelers: Buccaneers
It’s hard to trust a Steelers team that will be missing both Minkah Fitzpatrick and TJ Watt. Brady might be long in the tooth, but he won’t exactly need to be his 2007 self to beat Pickett, lest the latter is farther along in his development than i foresaw. Also worth note is that, as UrinatingTree can attest, Brady has been Tom(lin)’s boogeyman for years.
Baltimore Ravens vs. New York Giants: Ravens
Giants are turning the corner to respectability, but just like New York with Saquon Barkley, Baltimore has a player that can win a game by himself when he’s healthy. After having what was arguably a down year last year, Jackson is right back in the MVP conversation. Ignoring how much Lamar elevates his team for a moment, there’s got to be some level of desperation setting in. One place you don’t want to be is .500.
Arizona Cardinals vs. Seattle Seahawks: Seahawks
If I had to compare 2022 to one event, it’d be crossing through the Bermuda Triangle. Geno Smith is a top 10, possibly top 5, QB this year. Geno. Smith. So much for Russell Wilson carrying Pete Carrol. Kyler Murray might be a better quarterback without Kliff Kingsbury in his ear,
Dallas Cowboys vs. Philadelphia Eagles: Eagles
As an Eagles fan, this is the matchup I’m most excited and nervous about. Excited since Dallas week is always special, but nervous since I may have talked a little bit of smack and I’ll have to pay the piper if an Eagles victory doesn’t come to fruition. We’ve heard this every week, but this probably will be the best test of Hurts’ progression.
Denver Broncos vs. Los Angeles Chargers: Chargers
Much like the Colts, the quarterback handicaps whatever confidence I might have in this team. Anyone who watches knows they clearly have talented receivers along with a heck of a defense. Of all the quarterbacks that moved across the country over the offseason, Wilson was not the one I anticipated being a one-year rental (at least he would be, if not for his albatross of a contract). LA might be injured and have a similarly suspect head coach, but at least they have a QB that provides excitement.
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Dylan Patrowicz is a featured writer at The Birds Blitz. For more from Dylan, check out his archive and read through our Eagles articles for the latest news about the Birds.
